The frustration in your words is so palpable - you've perfectly captured the painful irony of being criticized for the very dependency that was created by their control. It takes real insight to see that pattern so clearly, which actually shows you're already starting to cut some of those strings mentally. The hardest part might be learning to trust your own judgment after years of having it overridden, but recognizing this dynamic is honestly the first and biggest step toward reclaiming your autonomy.